What do you do when you fall for a friend? And what if that friend happens to also be a family friend – as in, you know his parents, his parents know your parents, and they would all know if you suddenly started dating said friend? Here’s how to deal… (from my latest column with ABC Family and Secret Life)
Your Question: Ok so I really, really, really like this guy who happens to be one of my best friends and I’ve known him my whole entire life our families are really good friends. We don’t go to the same school but I see him on weekends with our families. I want to tell him that I like him and I have tried a couple of times but I got to nervous. Any ideas on how to tell him?
Thanks!
Annabeth
Dear Annabeth,
Crushing on a friend can be really nerve-wracking but it makes total sense. After all, you know him really well, as a friend first, and he probably knows you well, too. You know his sense of humor, what makes him nervous or upset, and how he treats his family – all important things to know about a potential boyfriend.
Since it can be overwhelming to come right out and say that you like someone, you can start dropping some pretty obvious hints that you like him.
First, since it sounds like you spend most of your time hanging out around your families, try suggesting that the two of you do something different. Not an official date, but maybe there’s a movie that you want to see or a school activity you want him to come to. If he seems up for being with you in a new situation, it’s a good sign that he might have feelings for you, too. See how it goes. If he seems to respond to your flirting (and is flirting back!), you’ll be able to tell if there might be a future for you two as a couple.
And then comes the big part – really telling him how you feel! Yes, you have to do it at some point. After all, you want to be able to be honest and straightforward in a relationship. But you can wait to profess your love until you’ve tested him out a little. Go out a few times and introduce him in to your life during the week. You’ll know when the moment is right. And in the meantime, have a great time getting to know him better and hanging out in different places. The process leading up to the relationship can be really fun, so enjoy it!
xxx
Sarah
